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Properly pleasuring your partner is a big part of being in a relationship. Whether that relationship is a physical one or not doesn’t really matter either. Your objective for being romantically tied to someone else is to provide them with the riches of your true personality. Hopefully for them, your true personality includes a willingness to give awesome body massages from time to time. And I’m not just talking about the kinds of massages you get at a day spa. All you need is an hour and 60 bucks to get one of those. I’m speaking, of course, about the best kind of massage there is – the kind that involves strategically rubbing on your partner’s pussy. All the cool kids are doing it.
Serving up a few sensual touches to the taco can change everything in your relationship. When done right, it has the power to remove emotional blockages, motivate lovers for more substantial play, inspire a sense of deep relaxation, enhance the participants’ orgasms, boost their mood and increase intimacy all at the same time. The last time you got that many perks out of a massage you ended up getting banned from the place. Learning how to give a good pussy massage at home is the much wiser option. Besides, at-home aesthetics let you release all your inhibitions without getting put in handcuffs (unless that’s what you want).
By the way, there’s more to giving your partner a crotch massage than simply petting them heavily below the belt. If that’s all it took, people would be doing it themselves all the time and relationships with actual human beings would be nonessential. I want you to keep in mind that masturbation and massage are two completely different things with unique approaches and even more distinctive outcomes. Now’s not the time to oversimplify such a sensual subject or scoff at silly it sounds. Genital massage has been around for so long that the ancients called it “yoni” and there’s a male version of it called “lingam.” Oh yeah, you’re gonna learn today.
Did you know that a human baby suffers greatly when it develops inside the womb without sensing the touch of another human being? Did you also know that a lack of physical connection in childhood can produce significant mental, emotional and social disadvantages all the way into adulthood? Studies have shown that people thrive the most when they’re making contact with others on a regular basis, which means the quality of that contact needs to be monitored and managed as closely as possible. According to some ancient myths, this fundamental understanding is how massage was invented. Throughout the years, we’ve learned how to make our bodies work for us instead of against us by developing better massage techniques through the discovery of reflexology.
Research has revealed quite a lot about how our brains react to external stimulation. We now know that certain types of touch motivate the release of endorphins into the bloodstream. We also know that a person’s blood pressure and heart rate can be temporarily reduced upon receiving a relaxing tap. On top of that, our most dedicated experts have learned that the brain and body don’t always agree on what’s happening on the surface. According to their findings, the brain gives more attention to certain parts of your body than it does to others. What that means for the masseuse is that he or she can deliver extreme sensations by simply activating those various zones – the most commonly known of which are the erogenous zones.
While the human form is dense with sensitive nerve endings on every square inch, the brain receives signals of contact in very different ways for each of them. There’s a receptor for vibration, another one for surface pressure and yet another for texture. Meanwhile, scientists have discovered and named a somewhat strange touch receptor called the Merkel Ending, which is characterized by its ability to pick up extremely fine sensations. Usually, Merkel Ending receptors are clustered in, on, or around parts of the body such as the fingertips, the lips and (you guessed it) the crotch. When properly stimulated, those ME zones can deliver more intense pleasures or pains than all the other receptors combined.
For a lot of women, the best way to experience those kinds of hyper-intense pleasures is to submit to a properly executed pussy massage. The problem is that too many people have no idea what that is, let alone how to pull it off properly. Aside from not knowing the ins and outs of the power of coochie contact, a lot of folks don’t realize that the human body is equipped with special neurotransmitters that can pick up on emotional touch as well. Mediated through sensors called C-tactile fibers, you can actually feel what someone else is feeling while they run their hands all over your body. In turn, your own emotions can warp the way you feel when all is said and done, so both participants have to understand what’s going on.
Believe it or not, these are actual words from a top doctor: “Sexual sensation affects so much of our lives, our social organization and what makes us human – and we don’t know the biology of it.” Isn’t that some scary shit? The thing that ensures mankind’s survival is generally misunderstood and, perhaps even worse, surrounded on all sides by taboos, rules and dogma. We may not know everything about the human response to sexual contact but we do know that pussy massage changes the game in more ways than one. The fact that our mindset can manipulate our perception of a partner’s sensual touch is both a blessing and a curse, so listen up.
In theory, a pussy massage is a lot like a regular massage only it involves rubbing on the vagina instead of on the back or feet. However, it’s crucial to understand that a good pussy massage will most likely involve attention being paid to those parts of the body as well. Essentially, yoni is supposed to be the ultimate erotic experience for both partners, but especially the woman – a session that culminates in more than getting finger-banged but less than getting fucked. It’s a time to explore the nooks and crannies of your bae’s body using your hands and/or any other tools you might have lying around. For most, that includes vibrating muscle massagers and specialized sex toys made exclusively for vaginal stimulation. Yum.
None of this is to say that you can’t deliver a righteous rub-down with your bare hands though. After all, that’s how it’s been done since the dawn of time and if it ain’t broke we shouldn’t fix it. The point of a pussy massage isn’t to be complex or creative. It’s to produce extreme mental, emotional and physical pleasure through activating various nerve endings in your partner’s ME zone which, in turn, modifies her perception and makes her more receptive to your agenda (be it erotic or therapeutic, it doesn’t really matter). As the masseuse in charge of all this, your main objective should be to provide whatever the little lady needs to eventually ejaculate. To do that, you’ll need to learn the reasons why women love this shit in the first place.
First things first, a pussy massage is one that plays off of the mental, emotional and physical cues of the receiver despite being a technique that concentrates primarily on the vulva. The influence of this exercise is such that it goes far beyond what traditional relaxation methods can typically provide. You see, when the right perspective and understanding are brought to the table, vaginal reflexology can become a profound healing ceremony for both the woman getting massaged and the partner doing the massaging. Besides being incredibly hot, this type of activity is also immensely therapeutic (especially for a struggling couple). When done right, it fosters a much closer connection and significantly improves her orgasmic quality.
As odd as it sounds, something as simple as pussy massage can invite a more mindful atmosphere into the bedroom. It essentially allows your female friend to evolve her sexuality and become more comfortable in her own skin. For women especially, the act is therapeutic because consent is the main focus. Realize that this might be the very first time in her entire life that someone has concentrated on her physical and emotional needs, asking permission before touching her delicate body and doing so with respect and dignity. It’s more likely that she’s been penetrated numerous times without experiencing that kind of honor. Proper pussy massage flips that shit on its head with a quickness.
This is when the magic happens, because small gestures like asking permission and putting her needs first can have an enormous impact on how a woman feels during intimate contact. In fact, a lot of women end up crying shortly after receiving a good pussy massage and do you know why that is? It’s because being treated with such reverence is what femininity is all about; it serves up a deep-seated reminder of her sovereign, sacred energy – the power she has over her own body and who gets to touch it. All too often, modern-day women are robbed of that opportunity. Unfortunately, the case has remained pretty much the same throughout our history, which is why the need for proper pussy massage has never and probably will never go away.
Here’s some news you can use: Statistically speaking, a large percentage of the female population has been the victim of sexual assault. In addition, most women report being involved in a traumatic incident wherein someone used their sexuality and/or appearance against them. Unacceptable social norms and untrustworthy behaviors like that can make any woman feel like her will has been overridden. That, in turn, can manifest itself into disruptive antisocial compulsions, mental illness, and an inability to reach orgasm. So, while you can’t change the world or the way it treats women, you can most certainly change the way your partner feels in your arms.
By doing the exact opposite of all those aggressive assholes, you confront their bullshit vicariously and help bring up her cloaked emotions to be dealt with in a much healthier way. You essentially buy a ticket into her heart with something more valuable than money. She may not be able to put her feelings into words but her body knows what’s up. And because the key component of a good pussy massage is to make your lady feel served, honored and adored, it will act as a spiritual gateway to some of her most vulnerable parts – not just her twat. Truth be told, you should have her like a putty in your hands long before you go anywhere near her va-jay-jay.
Good question. Here’s the simple answer: Both partners benefit from a properly executed pussy massage because of the nature of the act itself. Not only do you get to be up close and personal with your partner’s body but you also get to become an insider (in more ways than one). Meanwhile, they derive all the benefits mentioned above and everyone is happier and healthier when the smoke clears. And as long as this exercise isn’t treated like a special occasion that’s dished out only when she’s a good girl, it can become a foundational part of your love life and/or the thing that saves your marriage. Pussy massages: Women who get them grow from them, men who give them fortify from them, and couples who enjoy them strengthen because of them. They’re like hands-on insurance policies for your love life, with the most affordable (and enjoyable) premiums you've ever paid.
Here are some of the other, not-so-emotional issues that a good pussy massage can treat, cure or make less disruptive:
By the way, there’s one other advantage to pussy massage that I haven’t got a chance to mention yet. It’s called non-penetrative play and it’s a terrific alternative to traditional sex wherein the penis enters the vaginal canal. Sensual rub downs almost always result in an orgasm when they’re done right, plus they boost emotional closeness while promoting a healthier response to sexual activity in general. Therefore, pussy massages are also ideal for lesbian couples and for people who don’t necessarily enjoy being penetrated.
It’s one thing to Netflix and chill your way into a pussy massage but that’s not going to sustain you forever. People get bored with the same old thing all the time. That’s just human nature. Successful culminations typically include some preparation and pampering whether you like it or not. So, save the documentaries and romantic comedies for another time. You’ve got work to do.
There are a handful of different components you should always try to incorporate into your beaver cleaving sessions if you want to reap all the benefits I described above. Think of them as fortifiers for your fortress of fuckery. Without them in place, the entire thing comes crumbling to the ground. Your relationship already has enough to fight against; don’t be a part of the problem. Set up the perfect scene and execute this massage like you’re employee of the month at a 5-star sex spa or someone else will. This pussy power thing is becoming huge, so here’s what you need to know to keep up:
Above all, remember that communication is your biggest ally here. Because pussy massage involves so much respect, tenderness, admiration and consent, it makes sense to occasionally ask her how she’s feeling. “Do you like it when I do that?”, “Can I touch you here now?” and “How can I help you ___?” are all great comments to make. They won’t spoil the mood or bring her out of her comfort zone as much as they’ll make her feel more in charge of the situation which, in turn, will help her relax into your fingertips and cum out satisfied on the other side.
You can’t go attacking the vulva like it owes you money. Remember, a successful massage involves more than just touching your partner’s crotch with added surface pressure. This is an art form, thus there are expectations for both participants and plenty of responsibilities too. You be asking yourself, “Why is there so much required of me if this is supposed to be a sexy, relaxing experience?” Well, quite frankly, it’s because you’ll be wielding a gagglefuck of power and that shit takes some finesse. Make me proud by learning and implementing these simple etiquette and technique tips. She'll thank you now and you can thank me later.
THE GIVER'S PLAYBOOK
Giving a good pussy massage isn’t nearly as hard as you’ll be if you do it right. Watching your lovely lady melt with pleasure is one of the most satisfying things in life, hence why this exercise is so effective for men with sexual performance problems. Nonetheless, even Joe Shmoe Porn Star could learn a thing or two from slowing down and enjoying the moment. Meanwhile, all great givers mind the basics of the handbook, including these four fundamentals:
Never, and I mean never (sorry Justin Bieber), forget about the importance of showing up for this massage with a clean slate. I’m talking about your mind, your body and your business. See a doctor to get tested for STIs and other communicable diseases before attempting to touch anyone else’s skin and don’t go around airing your dirty laundry to the whole neighborhood just because your partner became vulnerable for a second. You’re an asshole if you ignore either one of those things.
If home is where the heart is, make sure your heart isn’t dusty, dirty and disgusting. Hoarding is sign of mental illness, clutter breeds chaos and filth is a fucking killer (literally). You shouldn’t expect your woman to feel safe, secure and sexy if her surroundings look like a war zone. Do your best to create a relaxing atmosphere, even if that means springing for some new bedroom furniture, sheet sets, sex toys, or cleaning products. You can do it, put your back into it.
Your first priority is to make this vulnerable woman feel cozy in your hands, not disrespected and like a hideous piece of meat. Know this, my friends, you can make a woman feel like that in more ways than one and sometimes you don’t even know how it happened. Ladies are intuitive and much is communicated through touch, so be gentle and courteous when handling your gal or I guarantee she’ll bite (and then lock up the love cave like you’ve never seen before).
Good luck trying to give a good vaginal rubdown when you only have chemically laden oils, scented aftershaves and hope. Your girl is not going to fall for that lame shit, so step your game up or step aside. You’ll need more than a few bottles of lotion and lube too. Your job is to plan this thing out like an event so she feels in control, meaning you should ask what her favorite products are or invite her to come along to pick them out.
See? Being the giver of some decent snatchy shiatsu isn’t too difficult. It’s all about being present in the moment while tuning in to your partner’s nonverbal cues. If all else fails, talk it out. You still remember how to use your words, don’t you?
THE RECEIVER'S MANUAL
As the lucky recipient of a well-timed pussy massage, it is your responsibility to reciprocate the effort by putting some effort in of your own. In other words, don’t just lay there like a dead fish. This is supposed to be easy and breezy, not depressing and difficult. Your emotions will most definitely flow like wine but that doesn’t give you the right to be a whiner. Mind these four fundamentals and receive your just desserts without having to justify the hurt:
Receivers, notice how your duty is do more than be a beautiful booty? Givers, don’t forget to have your little lady read the Pussy Massage Receiver’s Manual before setting the stage. This is meant to be a team effort with two winning sides. Follow the rules and you’ll be able to bend them at the same time.
Start the night (or day) off right by inviting her to lay down on her stomach. She can be wearing whatever suits her because it will all get taken off slowly anyway. Use the first 5-10 minutes of the session relaxing her via the shoulders and back. With good communication, slowly make your way to other potentially tense parts of her body – the arms and hands, the back of the legs and thighs, the feet, the glutes (gasp). If all goes well, invite her to slowly flip over to her back once she’s good and melted into the bed. This is where the fun begins.
Begin this next step by continuing to rub on her feet using the same amount of pressure you were using when she was laying on her belly. It’s crucial at this point that you ask her whether she likes your technique or not. Give her the chance to make adjustments to your form and pressure level before moving on. If you’re uncomfortable taking constructive criticism from a sexual partner, work on that privately prior to attempting such an intimate exercise with a woman. She will pick up on that nonsense and become afraid to tell you how she really feels because, by and large, ladies are incredibly intuitive and naturally nurturing. Once you’re both in the right state of mind and have the stage properly set for a decent experience, you can begin moving forward with the massage until you’ve accomplished your goal. Be sure to gently remove her clothing with permission and be sure the temperature of the room is conducive with nudity.
When her lovely lady lumps are all out on display and she’s ready to let you near her secret garden, use one of these top 8 most pleasurable pussy massage techniques to ensure her ultimate satisfaction:
By the way, it’s perfectly fine to add in sex toys at any point during this whole shebang. I know I mentioned it only once, but that’s just because it’s my favorite technique to use one with. No matter what you decide, vet your pleasure products with extreme caution because they’re not all made the same. Additionally, feel free to swap lubes and massage substances, switch out the mood music, stop to make out or do whatever the situation requires to run smoothly. These are not steadfast rules, they’re only strong suggestions from experienced experts. Nobody cares what those weirdos have to say anyway.
Look, vagina massages should always include attention to the breasts, and breast massages encourage circulation while reducing a woman’s risk of certain cancers. Satisfying orgasms boost the immune system, improve mood, decrease the symptoms of postpartum depression, mitigate menopausal upheavals and help you lose weight. Pussy massage is therefore good for a woman’s health, so as a caring partner it’s your duty to stimulate that booty for betterment of womankind. If that doesn’t move you to learn proper etiquette and technique, you’re dead inside. Seek help immediately.
You see, pussy massages are so intense that they require a post-session integration period wherein the woman processes all the emotions that were brought to the surface during the event. It’s her chance to experience growth, healing and love. Therefore, your efforts serve a purpose that’s far beyond the bedroom. It reaches into her soul and comes out the other side in the form of trust, commitment, comfort, and crazy ass sex. Just remember that the ultimate goal is to create a lasting, loving connection that puts sexual pleasure second to personal satisfaction.
Blake Parker makes Ron Jeremy look like Mother Theresa. His honest take on allthings pertaining to pleasure and relationships has made him a household name that’s synonymous with sexuality. Blake’s unique perspective on toys and techniques prepares the mind and body for more than just an incredible orgasm. Hisentertaining sex toy reviews, buyer’s guides, and How-To articles inform consumers of what nobody else will say. His readers demolish emotional/physical strongholds, tear down social taboos, and become more comfortable in their own skin as he and his partner enlighten the world one sex toy at a time. Notoriety isn’t the goal with Blake; satisfaction is.